Book Entry 114: 1973 Growing Up is Hard Sometimes

Occasionally if there was a storm or Heidi had a hard time sleeping she’d sneak into our bedroom.  She would stand with her nose nearly touching mine until I opened my eyes to see her.  She tried to stay in her bed but just didn’t seem able to.  We let her get away with sleeping with us until I was about five months pregnant.

I’d already had a scare after digging for a gopher.  Heidi kicked and squirmed in her sleep.  I didn’t want to take a chance she could accidentally kick me in the stomach and hurt our new baby.  The nightly fight was on!

We asked Heidi to stay in her bed.  She cried and made her way into our room.

We tried a night light and left the hall light on.  She cried and made her way into our room.

We tried new fluffy pillows and a new doll for her to sleep with.  She cried and made her way into our room.

One night I threatened her.  I said if she came into our room I would be sad but I would have to spank her and put her back in her bed.  A few minutes later she was once again nose to nose with me.  Her eyes were begging me to let her into my bed.  I had to stay true to my word.  It broke my heart but I spanked her and put her back to bed.  She cried very softly for a few minutes.  Her whimpering was followed by silence.  When I opened my eyes she was there again.

            I was at my wits end.  I picked her up, carried her to her bed, and told her how much I loved her.  I also told her if her feet touched the floor again that night she would have another spanking.

I went to bed.  The light in the hall was on.  I shut my eyes and pretended to sleep while I was really watching the hallway and praying Heidi would stay in her bed. Something caught my eye on the floor near Heidi’s door.  It seemed to be the end of one of her pillows.  A few seconds later another pillow plopped out to the middle of the hallway.  Heidi gently stepped to the middle of the second pillow.  She carefully turned to pick up the first pillow.  When she had it in her hands she turned again toward our room and placed the first pillow closer to us than the pillow she was standing on.  

After about five very careful placements of her pillows she was once again nose to nose with me.  “My feet didn’t touch the floor mommy,” she said with such hope and pride.  She was right.  She had placed her pillows perfectly from her bed to mine and made it all the way without touching the floor.  My heart melted.  I lifted the covers and she crawled in the winner!  I have looked back and marveled at her ingenuity over the years.  She was only three but she found “where there is a will there is a way.”

I solved the problem very easily by turning my back to her while we slept.  She did continue to wiggle and squirm in her sleep but never kicked me hard.